Hanoi Hilton & sadomasochism

10/4/11

We rolled out of bed and into Hanoi around 11am as the jet lag had certainly caught up with us. We found Hanoi to be cool clean and relatively calm. Each street in the old quarter is known by what it specialize in. Our particular favorites were Metal Street, String Street, Underwear Street and key Cutting Street.

Lunch was a lovely cabbage and pork soup for me and beef with cashew nuts for James. Joy of joy no curry. That said James chop stick skills were shown up and he had to resort to a spoon. Pre empting this Mia had thoughtfully bought James a pair of Chimp Sticks which are essentially children’s chop sticks held together at the top with little scoops on the bottom. We shall have to bring these out with us next time.

After lunch we walked round enjoying the sights and sounds of Hanoi before returning to the hotel to play scrabble on the Ipod. We have become obsessed with this, me in particular. I have 15 games on the go and appear to win about half. That said I have never beaten James yet even with a 50 point head start. Well I live in hope.

We had dinner with two English trainee doctors. They had both been health care assistants and had humanity… not always a pre request for a doctor. We ate more yummy food and drank beer and generally enjoyed ourselves.

11/4/11

We set of to the Hanoi Hilton which was the optimistic name given to the old prison. The tour was a coup in propaganda as the victorious, loyal and fearless prisoners held strong against the vicious and oppressive French colonialists and then the Americans. Balanced it was not but interesting never the less.

Lunch saw James and I seated on tiny children’s stools on the pavement eating street food. To one side the lady was cooking small beef burgers and the other side was a huge pot of boiling soup and noodles. Dinner was served and we were encouraged to add chilies. Unfortunately James innate clumsiness combined with his inability to use chop sticks (chimp sticks still in the bag) saw him tip 25 chilies into his bowel making his soup somewhat fiery, causing him to sweaty and sneeze. So in essence you had an oversized chimp sitting at a child’s table with his knees by his ears trying in an uncoordinated fashion to feed himself. A sight I wish I could have recorded.

The afternoon saw James preparing for a New Zealand phone job interview that he had scheduled for the next day. The job is working in an outpatient’s clinic dealing with oncology patients and general medicine. The hours are 9-5 Monday to Friday and the contract is for 48 hours per fortnight. Ideal if he could get it.

Whilst James was preparing for the interview I walked around Hanoi looking for the best price for a massage. I visited 6 establishments and inevitably the 1st one which was next door to our hotel was the cheapest at $5 US dollars for 1 hour. Well its good to know you have the best price! The event itself took us from the last erection inducing massage to sadomasochism. We walked into the room where small women were slapping cracking and vigorously rubbing men who looked to be in various states of distress. James very quickly opted for just the foot massage as having just paid for a chiropractic appointment he thought it wise.

I gamely striped down into a pair of proffered shorts and waited with trepidation. The first section was a lovely foot spar with warm water. Then it began. The foot massage was robust and the leg massage intense and then I was ordered to lie on my front. The next thing I felt was the lady climb on top of me and begin to pummel and crack every single joint in my body followed by a thump or slap. Having survived this I lay on my back with my head between her legs and the head and deep neck massage began followed by vigorous head turning inducing more cracks. Then it was over and I was dazed but very loose. I can’t decide whether I liked it or whether I had just paid to be tortured. James on the other hand felt fine and just a little sore.

Dinner saw us repeat the street food knees by ears routine but it was worth it as the food was yummy. Dinner was rounded off with some of the best ice-cream we have ever eaten followed by more scrabble (whilst we waited for the nightclub noise to stop) and then sleep.